I think your arguments are godd especially how you said it gives social challenging and brainwashing i agree with you. I think that you should include quotes like search in google or you can use quotes that we did in class to support your thesis and arguments. Also include your opposing views and conclusion. Other than that you did a good job! =))
I think for a rough draft you did a good job. I liked the how you said people in today's society eat,breathe,drink technhology and we revolve around it. You aslo included quotes from a person you met on the street which was good. You should include a signifciance part in your paper and a opposing view. By the way what is your EQ? Great first draft =)
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